Six beaches take most of the island's summer traffic, and they get talked about as if they were interchangeable. They are not. One is a line of beach clubs over awkward stones; another runs two and a half kilometres, with a club at one end and silence at the other.
We have set out what each is good for, so you can pick by the day you want rather than by the name you have heard.
Cala Jondal, for the beach clubs
South coast, and the one to come to if the plan is a long lunch rather than a swim. Blue Marlin runs from May to late September and sets the tone for the whole bay.
Be clear about the beach itself: it is large smooth stones, not sand, and getting into the water is hard work in bare feet. People come for the clubs and treat the sea as scenery.
Cala Bassa, for a family day
West coast, reachable by ferry from San Antonio every fifteen minutes in season. Three hundred metres of sand, a roped swimming area that keeps boats out, and pine wood behind for free shade.
Cala Bassa Beach Club takes one end. The rest of the beach stays ordinary, which is the point.
Cala Tarida, for space
Also on the west coast, wider than most and with white sand and shallow water. Cotton Beach Club sits above it and is one of the few places on the island open at weekends through the winter.
Cala Comte, for the sunset
The clearest water on the island, looking out at a pair of offshore islets, and the reason half of Ibiza drives west at seven in the evening. Sunset Ashram is on the point.
It is small for the number of people who want it, so arrive early for the day or late for the evening and skip the middle.
Ses Salines, for the scene
The long beach in the south, behind the salt pans and inside the natural park. The chiringuitos run along it from Jockey Club, going since 1993, down to Sa Trinxa at the far end.
Parking is behind the dunes and fills by late morning in August.
Playa d'en Bossa, for both at once
The longest beach on Ibiza, around two and a half kilometres. The northern end is where the music is; walk or drive to the southern end and the same water is almost empty.
Quick answers
Which is best for children? Cala Bassa, for the roped swimming area and the shade.
Which is not sand? Cala Jondal, which is smooth stone.
Which has the clearest water? Cala Comte.
Which is the longest? Playa d'en Bossa, at about two and a half kilometres.
Where do you go for sunset? Cala Comte, early enough to park.
Which is quietest? The southern end of Playa d'en Bossa, oddly enough.